She totally deserved it

While I know it's not a college football post, it's kind of sports-related. This is perhaps the best news article ever written. Apparently you can burst you windpipe by blowing on a vuvuzela for too long.

After watching a decent amount of the World Cup, there is no way anyone can say, "she didn't deserve it."

Also, this South African lady may have had the best "that's what she said" moment ever:

"He said I'd ruptured my throat by blowing too hard, and that perhaps I had been doing it all wrong."

The Big 12* Lives!

Well it looks like I was wrong regarding the collapse of the Big 12. While Colorado and Nebraska bolted for other conferences, the big boys (mainly Texas and Oklahoma) appear to have ended their flirtation with the Pac-10. Hopefully this marks the end of conference realignment for the remainder of this offseason.

Probably won't have any significant posts prior to the weekend, but I figured I'd continue the college crime blotter. The SEC is representing!

Arkansas FB Van Stumon was charged with drunken driving after police saw him drive over a curb and into a parking lot.

Florida WR Frankie Hammond Jr. was charged with drunken driving and subsequently suspended from team activities after he was arrested for driving over 45mph in a 20mph zone on the University of Florida campus. In addition to speeding, Hammond Jr. was allegedly swerving and had two open bottles of whiskey in his car.

Law and Order: College Football Style

Short post for me today, but a big day for the mildly threatening NCAA cops. Some schools even decided to take the law into their own hands, just before their "student athletes" managed to embarrass them too much.

Michigan: Denied the Big 10's highest rated recruit, DB Demar Dorsey, entrance into the university at the request of the school's admissions office. Besides being an on-the-field star, Dorsey had the potential to build an all-star "rap sheet" while at Michigan. Demar has already had two felony charges against him, although both were eventually dropped.

Colorado: The NCAA docked Colorado four football scholarships for failing to meet the their "Academic Progress Rate" standards.

Oregon: Oregon QB Jeremiah Masoli, who was already suspended for stealing laptops and a guitar from a fraternity, was kicked off the team days after he was arrested for driving with a suspended license and possession of marijuana. (I'm not sure why, but it seems like there are a disproportionally high percentage of stud-athletes who are arrested with either an expired or suspended license. I'm not sure whether there is a correlation between the two. I'm probably a sub-par athlete and I've never had an expired or suspended licence, so I'm going to go ahead and assert there is a correlation.)

USC: Received a two-year bowl ban and was docked ten football scholarships over the next three years. While I'm very happy about this, it still sucks that the NCAA really has no way to punish former USC head coach Pete Carroll. For those of you who are new to college football, Pete Carrol was the head coach at USC while all of the infractions occurred. Further, Carroll conveniently found a head coaching job in the NFL as the NCAA's investigation of his program intensified. The USC scandal really deserves a much more in-depth look, especially since it's one of the harshest penalties the NCAA has ever given, but there are so many other writers who can cover it much better than I can.

Who Wants a BCS Title Contender?!

Apparently the Mountain West Conference (MWC) does not. According to AP reporting, the presidents of the Mountain West Conference decided against extending an invitation to Boise State, which is currently a member of the Western Athletic Conference (WAC). Although MWC Commissioner Craig Thompson clarified that his conference's decision was not final and that the MWC was just waiting to see how the greater NCAA conference alignment would play out, I still don't understand the logic in not extending an invitation at the earliest possible moment. What is the downside to having Boise State in your conference? Sure, they play on a ridiculous looking blue artificial turf field, so what? They are a great team, check out their record since joining the WAC in 2002:

2002: 12-1 (8-0 in conference)

2003: 13-1 (8-0)

2004: 11-1 (8-0)

2005: 9-4 (7-1)

2006: 13-0 (8-0)

2007: 10-3 (7-1)

2008: 12-1 (8-0)

2009: 14-0 (8-0)

Beyond their ridiculous dominance of the WAC, Boise State routinely beats bigger conference teams in BIG games. Most recently, Boise State beat the MWC Champion TCU in this year's BCS Fiesta Bowl. Also, don't forget that Boise State used the freaking Statue of Liberty play to beat Oklahoma in the 2007 Fiesta Bowl. Think about that, the freaking Statue of Liberty play...even the crappy non-HD youtube version of it is awesome.

If Boise State finds greener (or bluer) grass in another conference, I have a feeling that Craig Thompson and the MWC presidents are going to feel a lot like Arrested Development's Tobias Funke after his failed attempt to land a role with the Blue Man Group.

Time Zone Wars!

I'm not sure if this is some new form of passive-aggressive tactic or just some kind of scheduling anomaly, but Wake Forest will play Stanford on September 18th at 11:15 p.m. Eastern Daylight Time on ESPN2. I'm guessing that this is likely payback for last year's Wake Forest-Stanford game, which had Stanford traveling to Winston-Salem, NC for a 9:00 a.m. Pacific Time start.

The Fall of the Big 12

According to the American-Statesman (an Austin, TX-based newspaper), both Missouri and Nebraska have been given an ultimatum to decide whether their respective futures will remain with the Big 12. Both schools have until Friday (June 11) to notify Big 12 officials whether they'll be headed to the Big Ten conference.

If both schools do choose to leave, it's likely that the Big 12 will start to collapse in on itself like a dying star. The Pac-10 already appears to be ready to extend an invitation to Texas, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State and Colorado. Pac-10 commissioner Larry Scott, in addition to looking to expand his conference, will reportedly recommend that the Pac-10 start its own television network, which could provide each conference member $20 million in annual payments. According to ESPN, Big 12 teams currently earn between $7 and $10 million annually under their current television contract. As always, if you're looking to find out what's going to happen to your favorite conference, follow the money.

Urban Meyer Health Update

University of Florida head football coach Urban Meyer revealed today that the chest pains he experienced last year were related to esophageal spasms which can be treated through medication. Meyer, who briefly left the UF program last December because of these chest pains, has been taking more time this off season to devote to family time and other non-football activities.

In other SEC news, the SEC meetings kicked off today in beautiful Destin, FL. If you haven't been there, I strongly recommend heading down there when you have a chance. Great golf, fishing*, beaches*, etc.

*Disclaimer: No clue as to how the beaches and the fishing are holding up after the BP oil spill.